To all my ambitious, motivated, and amazing readers;

Thank you so much for the last five months. Since I started my blog back in September, my favorite part of the day has been sitting down and writing great and practical content for you to use.

One of my goals this year is to expand the blog to as many readers as possible. In fact my goal is to reach more than 10,000 subscribers by the end of the year.

To help me to do this, I realize I have to change a few things including figuring out what you guys want me to write about, providing quality content, and upgrading the website.

So this is not a post about quitting. Quite the opposite, I want to blog even more in the future.

During this transition stage, I want to devote as much time as I can to making the relaunch blog the best I can make it. As a result I will no longer be writing for Find My Motivation to focus all my time and effort on launching the new blog (which will still be about finding your motivation). The new blog will be based on the same content but on a different website that I am developing right now.

I am looking for suggestions for blog names, content, and how I can improve my blog. I would love your input (it is anonymous).

To stay updated, add your email to my mailing list (I don’t like spam, so I won’t and you can request to take yourself off at anytime).

I will be moving my blog to the new site by the end of August and I will update you on my progress every now and then.

Thank you for understanding and I hope you will continue to support me through this stage.

Until next time,

- Davis

Today’s Featured Writer is Tina Ho, who wrote about holding on to your dreams.

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“I want to go into space.”
“I want to be a king.”
“I want to rule the world!”

Silly children’s fantasies? You may think so, but these dreams weren’t said because they were empty. To the children on the playground who once said these words, these goals held a passion, held a longing and held hope.

“Get your head out of the clouds!”
“Really? Are you serious? That’s impossible.”

As adults, we hear these statements all the time. We hear them every time we doodle in our notebooks; we hear them every time we look out the window; we hear them every time we think of something unconventional. These are some of the reasons why growing up, we lose our tendency to dream. We get trampled on, pushed on, and realize that there is a distinct line between what is real and what is fantasy. 

Every time I drive home from Atlanta at night, I would look outside the window and see the plethora of lights and skyscrapers. The ambience suddenly made me imagine that I was the Chief Executive Officer of a multi-billion dollar company. I dreamed of myself being able to sit in my office and I relished in the essence of my success. Yet, once I opened my eyes (I was not driving by the way), I realized how far that dream was from where I was. I realized how I was just in a plain Toyota with a plain book bag in the back seat feeling tired from a long, hard day.

I felt that dreaming was bad, because it showed me the place where I could never be; it showed me what I want and just like that, it took my dream away too. I realized how normal I was. I can never be a CEO. I rationalized to myself that I had to be super smart and I had to know the right people. Yet somehow, no matter how much I rationalized, there was still a burning hope that maybe I was wrong and that maybe one day, that dream will come to pass. I later realized that dreams were not meant to show you where you cannot be, but where you CAN and WILL be. It might not happen today or tomorrow, but one day I will be that CEO siting in that office.

———-

If you have any comments, suggestions for future topics, or want write contact me at findmymotivation@gmail.com.

My blog is updated daily. Return tomorrow for another article.

 

When I was 13, I wanted to be a non-fiction writer. I thought being a non-fiction writer was the coolest profession in the world. Writers aren’t afraid to put their ideas in the open for criticism, get paid to write about what they love, and have flexible working hours. I said to myself that when I grew older, I would be a non-fiction writer. In particular, I would write non-fiction self-help books (the same books that helped me turn my life around).

As I started high school, I realized that being a writer wasn’t as great as I thought it would be. Writers don’t always say what is on their mind and what they love; sometimes they have to write to pay the bills. Those who do put themselves in the open don’t all have steady salary, in other words, unemployment was high. I abandoned my dream and instead researched into other areas of interests: law, politics, business, engineering, IT, etc.

In college, I kept hearing “do what you love and the money will come” and variations of it. The problem was most of the people who said them were working on Wall Street, Capitol Hill, or in research labs. A few editors here and there, but I had yet to encounter a self-help writer. Then I discovered, the digital nomad community, people who use digital technologies to perform their work duties from all around the world.  After reading a few stories from people like Tim Ferriss, Chris Guillebeau, and Corbett Barr I grew the confidence I needed to pursue my interest.

Although Tim, Chris, and Corbett all specialize in different field their common message was, if you can find a market for your passion you can succeed. Helping people set goals and achieve their dreams is something I enjoy and know people can benefit from. As a result, that childhood dream I once thought was silly doesn’t seem quite ridiculous after all. I still have dreams of one day publishing a book.

Tomorrow’s Featured Writer is Tina Ho, who will follow up on today’s post by talking about holding on your childhood dreams.

Exercise:

What are some childhood dreams you still want to accomplish?

If you have any comments, suggestions for future topics, or want write contact me at findmymotivation@gmail.com.

My blog is updated daily. Return tomorrow for another article.

Reader Submitted Questions

For goals that are difficult to find a network support, how do you keep yourself motivated and create a feed-back practice environment? For example, if I want to learn the art of picking up, I wouldn’t be able to tell the world about my intention. How and who can I practice it? 

Remember that a support network also includes mentors. In your example of mastering the art of pick up, remember that Neil Strauss has Mystery, who served as Strauss’ mentor and the person who held him accountable for his progress. If you have a goal you can’t tell the world, you can usually find a mentor. If you can’t…you probably shouldn’t be doing it.

Reader Submitted Questions

When did you start applying the time management principles (ex. Paretto and 80-20 rule)?

I started using a planner in middle school and then the Parkinson’s Law and the Paretto/80-20 rule when I read about them in high school.

What would you do when tasks take longer to finish and your mind is not in the zone to tackle them? Do you switch to another item on the to-do list or continue to push through the time allocated for it?

I do advocate to-do lists because they don’t give you a sense of what is important and what is not. To-do lists encourage quantity instead of quality.

Reader Submitted Questions

If you can’t finish your assignments before you go to bed and it’s due tomorrow, what should you do?

I would weigh my option (how muchYou’ll find that as you begin to practice better time management, you won’t run into a problem like staying up late doing an assignment because you would have already completed them before.

Do you party in college? What if I want to party in college? I would go out twice a week on Friday and Saturday, and that affects my cycle of sleep the next day and the next week. How could I fix that?

I stay up late on Fridays and Saturdays too. When I do go to bed, I sleep in a bit the next day (I wake up a little later on Saturday and Sunday), but then my routine picks back up. If you sleep around the same time during the weekday and then sleep late on the weekend, your body will go back to normal that Monday unless you didn’t get enough sleep/too much sleep on the weekend.

If you’re studying for a test, but you’re exhausted due to recent continuous deadlines and exams, and it’s only mid-day or early in the afternoon/ evening, will you take a nap and catch up later, or will you take coffee and keep pushing through assignments?

I don’t drink coffee, but if you are tired beyond the point that you can’t tell a carat from a carrot, then you need to take a break.

Why did you start the blog and decide to stay committed to it?

I started my blog back in September for two purposes. One was to keep track of progress on my goals and two to give advice to others trying to accomplish their own goals. I decided to stay committed because I found that I was learning a lot by writing daily posts.

How advanced ahead are YOU designing your life? Do you design your whole life, knowing not what you want to do and opportunities that may be open, or keeping to your original plan of getting specific results and opportunities?

I know what I am doing today and the rest of this week. I know somewhat what my month is shaping like, but I don’t have my year planned out in detail. I know generally what I want to get done, but do not always have specific to-do lists for months ahead. I narrow down what I want, but keep my plans flexible enough so that I can add and change as new opportunities and priorities arrive.

Do you have a back-up plan? What if your goal is so hefty that the chance of you succeeding is miniscule compared to the chance of you failing? What happens if you fail to “land on the moon?”

Depends on my goal, but if you mean something financial (like starting a business), then I would have a back-up plan.

How do you get a fitness test? (the one you do for your workout).

The one I used during my insanity workout was included in the workout, but you can find fitness tests by just Googling them. The key is to pick one that measures you on the different aspects of your workout and one that you can repeat periodically to measure your progress.

How many goals would you carry on simultaneously? If there is no specific number, then how about a range?

My number depends on the magnitude of the goals. I usually start with a few and drop/add until I am comfortable with the time and quality I am devoting to each goal.

You mentioned “Observational Learning.” What is the difference between that and Passive Learning? How do you keep yourself from being bored or distracted while “observing?”

Observational learning is when watch someone else do something you want to do. How I keep myself active and engaged is to either take notes about what I like that I see what I don’t like.

Hi guys,

Just wanted to use today to update you on future plans for our blog. I have laid out some plans to relaunch with a bigger and better this summer. If you haven’t already sign up for our mailing list to receive updates on my progress.

You can signup for updates below:

(Your information is private and I don’t spam).

Here is a look at what is ahead for this week:

SUNDAY:                  Q&A with Davis: Personal Questions

MONDAY:                Q&A with Davis: Questions about School/College

TUESDAY:                Q&A with Davis: Questions about Time Management

WEDNESDAY:          Q&A with Davis: Questions about Support Networks

THURSDAY:             How to Keep Your Motivation Alive

FRIDAY:                    Featured Friday: Childhood Dreams

- Davis

Today’s featured writer is Mendy Yang. Mendy is a sophomore at Yale University interested in studying way too many things, but focusing on economics and psychology in particular. The little, “ordinary” things in life makes her happy, like silliness with friends, people’s sincerity, and most of all, love and laughter.

——–

Halfway through the semester, after complaining for the 2341351235th time about how little I was learning in physics, one of my friends asked me in puzzlement: “Mendy, why are you even taking that class?” I was a bit taken aback, but I immediately poured out a bunch of reasons, the top one among them being “It’s required for pre-med.” 

Over the weekend following that conversation, I realized that maybe I had been deluding myself, just a little bit. I didn’t want to confront that question because the answer was more complicated than I wanted to admit, because the answer revealed something that would throw off the entire balance of my semester. But try as I might, I couldn’t get it out of my mind, and with the course drop deadline quickly approaching, I found myself thinking more and more about why I was taking physics in the first place. Again and again though, the strongest reason that I could come up with was that I wanted to take it in order to fulfill a pre-requisite and keep pre-med open as an option. Otherwise, I didn’t find the material interesting, I wasn’t learning anything from the class, and it certainly wasn’t contributing to my overall enjoyment of life at Yale. 

Despite all of the signs pointing towards the obvious, something held me back from going to the Master’s Office and turning that drop form in. Like most students at Yale, I had never, ever been a “quitter;” I didn’t ditch projects halfway, and I didn’t give up just because something was hard. So even though I hated physics and got nothing out of it, I kept telling myself that to drop it was to fail, and I couldn’t fail, especially at a place like Yale. 

Yet here I am today, physics free. So what changed? Someone told me that “It takes courage to give something up.” When I was confronted with the issue of dropping physics, I finally realized what this seemingly paradoxical statement meant. Dropping physics wasn’t giving up; instead, it was the first time I had ever been brave enough to act for myself. I forgot about what was expected of me, what my parents wanted, what everyone else told me. I dropped physics not because I gave up or because it was too difficult, but because I knew I owed it to myself to make time to think through all of the things I was doing at Yale. Not only to think through it all, but to digest all that I had taken on, to make sense of everything that I had experienced. 

Sitting here now, having just finished the first semester of my sophomore year a week ago, I know that I made the right decision. Since I got to college, I have been constantly doing and reacting, never stopping for a moment to analyze or ponder. Dropping physics didn’t mean that my life fell into place perfectly after that, but it was the first step towards figuring out what I want to do with my future. With the time that I would have spent Facebooking and drifting off in a useless, meaningless, required class, I have instead shadowed professionals in various career fields, talked to a diverse group of experienced professionals and peers, and taken a good look at myself.  

Through this process, if there’s one piece of advice I have for anyone else who is still struggling with choosing a major or settling on a career path, is that no matter what, we cannot settle. Settling for something when we don’t know ourselves and haven’t taken the time to understand ourselves leads to regrets, which is the fastest recipe to disaster. Though I still haven’t decided on my own path yet, I know that I am slowly discovering myself and all of the amazing possibilities out there in a way that I never could had I not said no to walking a set path, to a perfectly laid out route. I realized that before, pre-med’s largest appeal was that it was a path low in risk, one that had already been worked out by so many others. Now, I know that if I end up choosing pre-med, it’ll have to be because it’s the path I want, the battle I want to fight. Otherwise, I now know I have the courage to say no, to assess and re-assess, and ultimately, to embrace a future that I am 100% in love with. I, and every single one of us, owe it to ourselves to find that passion and not to settle for anything less. 

Yesterday, I started to talk about why we say yes, when we really want to say no.  Today, I want to continue with how to say no.

Below are two ways to say no without lying.

  1. “I can’t give it my full effort.”

When I have a lot of other priorities, I tell people that I hate to commit myself to something half-heartedly. They will understand that the reason I say no is not that I don’t appreciate the opportunity but that I won’t be of help to the extent that would benefit either side.

  1. “I can’t but you might want to ask…”

Usually, when I can’t take advantage of an opportunity or help a friend, I recommend someone else who can.  If the other person is free and accepts, then it becomes a win-win-win for everyone.

Do you have any other ways you use to say no?

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